Friday, 18 December 2009

Where am i going wrong?!

I can't shift a single pound!

I know M was right when she said i was results and i was them yesterday, but even so, after not shifting a pound! i feel like i may well just go and stuff my face with chocolate & cereal...... but i know i'd be very angry and regret it soon after.

What is wrong with me? Why won't it go? I'm going to try my hardest to eat little and often and pray that my metabolism starts up again. Instead of trying not to eat at all, which the sensible, knowledgeable part of my brain knows is going to SLOW the metabolism and my body is going to hang onto every calorie it gets. Listen to the sensible side, Susie! Trouble is despite know that, i'm finder it rather hard to eat, as anything more than fruit or something that is low in fat yet high in protein, seems like the food of the devil right now.

So i'll start with the fruit and see where we go from there. Must put grapefruit on the shopping list while i think of it.

It might be a little awkward to get to the gym today, due to 'adverse weather conditions' - what the british media call a few inches of snow!! But it does make driving difficult, and unnecessary journeys are not advised by the county i am on the border of.......although i'd debate the gym as being unnecessary in my situation/mental state! I might have to be content with cleaning the house. However given that i couldn't walk up the stairs without severe pain in my quads, which seem to be suffering the most right now. So i think i will try and have a bath although i never have had much patience for sitting in a tub of warm water, but other that painkiller gel for muscles i'm not sure much else it going to help my legs.

I have developed another problem and dilema overnight. Yesterday morning i noticed the buen scar on my arm had developed into a blister, and being the stupid thing i am (who can't leave things alone) i drained that small amount of fluid and continued with the aqueous cream. However this morning, the fluid is no longer clear and almost looks slightly infected. I think i kind of have 3 options.

  1. Drained the blister again but go back to using the Bactoban cream, which is an antibacterial
  2. Get an appointment with J, and see what she thinks is the best idea and ask her if she thinks the bactoban is a good idea or whether it needs something a little stronger. However i'm pretty sure K told me that neither her or J were around today.
  3. Call the burns outpatients, speak to the nice nurse i saw this week, and check with her.

There is always a 4th option - leave it and if its still bad (or worse) on monday, then try and see J. I guess in someways i feel like i'm almost looking for a reason to see J....... If you'd met her and had known her for at least 10 years i think you would too.

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