Tuesday, 22 December 2009

Susie's Appetite must die

I can't cope with this. I am constantly hungry and it really sucks. I can't get rid of it either. How can i stop it before i stop myself in less healthy ways.

Breakfast was ok, lunch was there too with an extra of half a wholemeal pitta (the other half went into a pate recipe i attempted - i tried to copy something i bought in london, needless to say it tastes nothing like it!) Dinner was good actually and its been fruit ever since.

I have stuffed with fruit today inbetween, only slipping up once with a bowl of fruit and fibre at about 3pm.

Closest i got to chocolate was a couple of options hot chocolates.

So how do i stop it? I was no more or less hungry today than i was yesterday when i stuffed with a couple of cakes and cereal too, and lots of chocolates. Its ridculous. I feel like i may as well be pregnant! well i feel like i am eating for 2, my stomach feels big enough and bloated enough, and as for my chest....... Well, to be blunt i have never had such big breasts - at least for me they seem huge! I'm sure the were never this big before i lost weight, but then again i've never been this heavy in general really. They are starting to annoy me though. I know selfish, when there are those out there who have lost their femininity to breast cancer etc. But i guess its just adding to the self hatred thats growing by the second.

I just wish i had some energy and strength to get me to the gym but my body almosts feels like it could sleep constantly right now. Seems like that gym membership might be slightly wasted. lets hope after christmas i can book into some classes regularly and get this backside (well, more the stomach) into shape!

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