Tuesday, 27 January 2009

Life without Anorexia

Carrie, at ED Bites has posted on a subject that i think is probably a big part of my struggles with anorexia. The title of her post is "If not ED, then what?". I think from my point of view though i don't know an adult life without major struggles regarding to mental health problems.

For the last 10 years, there has always been some kind doctor, therapist, psychiatrist, medication, hospital etc etc. I'll be 23 this year and 5 years into adult life, things have bascially got worse over the first couple of year and then changed direction over the last couple. So for me it doesn't feel like "It destroyed my life" like Carrie says but more, it IS my life.

Unlike Carrie, i don't have a pet, I don't have a desire to travel, in fact i don't even have the desire to leave the house some days and the only motivation to do so is to go and walk somewhere with the mission of burning calories or to escape the house and go and find a tea room somewhere, because i don't trust myself not to eat 'too much' at home (which is how i feel today).

On another note, i found this post, at Grey Thinking, detailing how inpatient stay can be very detremental and make you worse and drive your ED even more. They are all things i feel whole heartedly and would say applied to me with regards to self harm and hospitals too. Although i admit there were times that it was needed.

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