I'm noticing a pattern forming. Eat one day then spend the next 2/3 days at the gym...... Then again i guess this is probably a normal thing for lots of people.
Usually its a case of burning off the emotional eating from the weekend, however todays eating is a mixture of emotional and keeping my strength up due to feeling ill physically. Right now depsite having stopped sneezing and coughing (which is how i woke up this morning), i have a headache, slight ear ache, want to sleep (more than usual) and my taste buds seemed to have gone awry. Nothing tastes right, or particularly satisfying. The closest i can get to tasting right is pretty bland, plain things like branflakes and a pack of walkers baked ready salted crisps - as i said keeping my strength up! Especially as i am supposed to be meeting a friend tomorrow to give her a late xmas pressie before she returns to uni. This will involve lots of walking in the cold, and also if the forecast is correct, snow too!
Right now though i feel like barely moving off the sofa. I cancelled the gym class i was booked onto, and i am fighting sleep. I know it would probably be better if i gave in, but i feel like i shouldn't sleep. Its bad enough that i barely leave the house, sleeping is just even lazier.
I just wish i could get rid if the headache right now and work out what my stomach is trying to tell me. I feel hungry, yet nothing tastes as it should and when i stand up after i feel nauseus - the hunger is taking over though again. I need to find something to curb it before i lose the plot completely. I wish i could find the strength to restrict as i used to, but it seems i'll just be working hard in the gym instead.
M called yesterday while i was at the gym, offering me an appoinment for next week. Why can she not understand that i really am not justified in seeing her anymore. Unless she wants to see me because i'm overweight now?
Homophobia kills
8 years ago
Posts
3 people had something to say about this:
I am no expert, but it sounds like you have a virus infection, so that giving in to sleep would be a good idea.
Yes, it's normal for exercise to cause hunger so that your body can replace its energy stores. Exercise also builds muscle, which increases your weight. If you exercise a lot, then your body needs a high-energy diet — that is, a high fat diet.
If you try to restrict the fat in your diet, you'll want to eat more sugar and other carbohydrates, so you'll feel hungry more of the time, and perhaps feel bloated, and be more likely to store excess body fat.
You are still entitled to see M - your weight is irrelevant. EDs are about thoughts and feelings about food and eating as much as they are about the behaviours, and she obviously considers that you still need her support. Don't turn down help because you think you're not entitled to it, because you are. x
Bippidee - I know. she says i gained the weight too quickly and its now that i need the most support. Thing is i don't want support, i want to lose the extra weight.
CBTish - I think mum has brought the illness home from work. a few of the people in her office are rather unwell - more than just a cold it seems.
I realise exercise causes hunger, but surely to lose the extra weight/flab i need to burn off whats there without replacing it in my diet?
I think feeling ill is certainly making me care less right now. I've just had a yummy hot cross bun (well, minus a bit of the outside which i burnt/caramalised) that mum bought home from work because they weren't being eaten. They were going to be for the birds, but mum decided they weren't that dry & were edible. Yay!!! I've stopped sneezing for the moment, so it must have been good for me!
Post a Comment