Still Hungry :(

after all this today:

• cereal - bowl of branflakes and maple and pecan crunch
• 1 mandarin
• chocolate rice crispy bar
• 6 goats cheese baby bel
• bread pudding
• tuna and sweetcorn baguette (this size)
• more bread pudding
• large greek salad with feta
• 3 mandarin
• chomp bar
• 4 opal fruit/starburst

oh i missed out 3 choccie eggs from thortons - creme egg sized 1, 2, & 3


AND I'M STILL HUNGRY! AGGGGHHHHH

i need to get a drink, dinner was quite salty and i thiknk its made me extra thirsty but i know i won't manage it without eating something. i think i'm going to grab a pear. if i decide up here i might stand a chance of not raiding the chocolate tin!

This is just far too much stress, so i'm running away to Nan's otherwise i will end up killing myself (and i'm not kidding!) or at least start cutting a lot more again. And at this rate it would be every couple of hours! I'm hoping with constant company and supervision i will stick to my "normal" meal plan. i just need to make it clear to nan that i need to stick to the plan i've typed up but i need her help to stick to it and not go over it. I don't think right now theres a fear of going under it!

its gone from one extreme to the other! i hope its not side effects from meds because if it is then its not going to go away......


Edit: dammit mum was still downstairs and in the lounge with the fruit bowl (sounds like cluedo!). glass of milk and 4 pack starburst again - oopps

Edit 2: so much for the pear - pear, chomp, mini curly wurly and mini dairy milk... i've really had enough of fightin me today....