Thursday, 9 January 2014

Forgetful

I think I may have just double dosed on my meds again..... I'm not sure.  I wasn't sure if I took the lunch time dose so took one just in case and I've just done the same with the night time dose.

Don't suppose it really matters as it doesn't have to much of an effect  short term.  I think there has been a difference since the dose increase in general long term, its been a  month now.

My brain just feels like mush right now. I don't know if its from too much revision and  too much stress, or taking the high dose of beta blockers to get through a study session today. (that turned me into a zombie after a week on them last time, with mum begging me to stop taking them because I was just so depressed and hadn't been like that for a few years).

I think the beta blockers did the job, well my heart rate barely got off the floor that's for sure.  Would have been interesting if someone had tried to take my pulse!  So I think I will use them for the real exams.  They may stop the physical symptoms but I'm not sure they can stop the emotions.   I am planning to meet with someone onmy support network afterwards on Monday,  so I can cry with someone and hopefully avoid too much destruction,  although that didn't stop me last time but then I think I was a lot lower and distressed already last time.

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